What Coaches Do
While it's difficult to define the parameters of the coaching profession, we can at least begin by discussing some of the services that coaches provide. To keep it simple, we can start by saying that coaches help people make desired changes in their lives. These can include changes in behavior, thought patterns, or the formation of new habits.  It could also mean a change in perspective; what some people call a paradigm shift.

Essentially, there are two ways in which coaches facilitate change; the first is external, and involves behavior.  The second is internal and involves thoughts, feelings, and attitudes.  When it comes to behavior, a coach's primary function is as a motivator.  Why do I need motivation, you might ask. if I really want to make a change in my life, and if it's important enough to me, I'll do it, I don't need to depend on someone else to motivate me.  Well, maybe you don't, but most of us do.

Total self-motivation is a myth, and is not consistent with what we know about human nature.  If we could rely only on ourselves, we would not need to ever attend school, we could simply teach ourselves. While this is certainly possible, it's not very efficient.  For most of us, self-discipline is a constant struggle; and having support systems in place sure makes the process a lot quicker and easier.  It's kind of like pushing a rock up a hill without a wheelbarrow.   Sure, you can do it, but I'd rather work smart than work hard.

Imagine a course where you had to design your own curriculum, choose your own textbooks, and create your own assignments.  While some people might find this prospect liberating, most people would give up quickly.  Such a class would offer no support, and no incentive to keep going.

Now, consider a traditional classroom setting.  In a classroom, there are all kinds of external structures in place to help motivate you and keep you accountable. In fact, let's look at the word "accountable."  It literally means we must give an account to someone. Another way to look
at it is that someone is counting on me to get something done; and if someone else is counting on me, I'm more likely to accomplish a task.

One form of accountability that classrooms provide are those dreaded deadlines and due dates. Though many associate deadlines with negatives like working under pressure and pulling all-nighters, we can also view deadlines in a positive light. Deadlines are a kind of support system, a cheerleader; if you will.  "Come on,” they say, “you can do it by this date; I know you can."  Even if a deadline must be extended, it still gives us a specific, concrete time-line for a specific, concrete goal.

Coaching Philosophy

Part 1: What is Coaching?

Part 2: What Coaches Do?

Part 3: The Reality of Human Frailty

Part 4: Listening to The Barbarian

Part 5: The Limits of Willpower

Part 6: Indirect Change

Part 7: To Give or Not to Give Advice, That is the Question

Part 8: Transparency and Authenticity

Part 9: Don't Go Changin', to Try and Please Me

Part 10: Self-acceptance, Not Self-improvement

Post Script

The great advantage of deadlines, assignments, and other classroom tools is that they are externally imposed.  If we tried imposing them ourselves, we might be tempted to keep putting them off; and eventually we would find something else to do and never finish the project.  A coach can also impose deadlines, assignments, and many of the same kinds of external motivators that make it easier for us to accomplish our chosen goals.

The second way coaches can help us change is by helping us to see ourselves more clearly and accurately.   To one extent or another, we are all in the dark about ourselves.  In other words, we all have blind spots.  But a blind spot is not necessarily a bad thing.  We might be blind to our strengths, as well as our weaknesses.  After all, aren’t we often our own worst critics?  And even our weaknesses can serve a positive purpose.  If we delegate certain tasks to others because we're not good at them, we are providing them an opportunity to give, as well as letting them show their own strengths.

In the next several articles, I will deal more thoroughly with these two aspects of coaching.  But in order to do so, we need to first answer a question; why is it so difficult for us to change?

Continue to Part 3: The Reality of Human Frailty